Friday, July 17, 2009

Get your damn hands off her, Biff

Unrelated Thoughts.

This is a pretty neat story, though it immediately brought to mind (well, to my mind) the bad Seth Green horror movie Idle Hands. Perhaps this guy can get a gig doing ads for State Farm Insurance. Good Hands indeed. Even when they're Hand-me-downs (boo, hiss).

Speaking of hand jobs, Glenn Beck proves that if there is a God, he is not without a pretty good sense of humor. Fox is still the go-to place for comedy that it was in its formative years in the late 80s, (Remember Married with Children before Steve Rhoades left and jumped over the shark on his way out the door?) Who would have guessed back then that it would be the News division carrying that torch now, however unintentionally? With Beck and O'Reilly leading the charge.

I'll be the first to admit that MSNBC is often just as bombastic, teetering as they are on the left wing of the plane as much as Fox is on the wrong wing, but at least they wear their bias with some intelligence at the DOS Peacock. Don't get me wrong: Keith Olbermann's blustering buffoonery and self-righteousness is occasionally overwhelming, even to a bleeding heart, commie pinko socialist radical like me.

I love Keith and Rachel but is having just one guest with a contrary opinion asking too much? A surprisingly effective Ben Affleck captured Keith's blustering self righteousness to a tee on a recent SNL.

Still, we're talking relative degrees of annoyance. Beck and O'Reilly take obnoxiousness to a new level. I have to take anti-nausea pills before flipping the channel past Fox news since even a brief glimpse of any of the regular jokesters there without proper medicine will induce me to projectile vomiting. But they are funny.

And that's where Beck and O'Reilly and his ilk live - as clowns, not fit for the news. On the day that we lost perhaps the most iconic and respected journalist in Walter Cronkite, the contrast is blinding. These cheapjack punks are in the same business as Walter?

I guess.

In the same way that Filet Mignon and a steaming pile of dog shit are both food to a starving animal.