I've been watching the
women's curling gold medal for the past two hours. And I don't even have a fever anymore. As I write this, they're going to "extra ends." A real thriller, with
Canadian pride hanging on the line!
I've really been getting into this sport with a vengeance over these
Olympics and don't understand why others can't see its genius.
I guess that's why there hasn't been a decent
curling movie produced (or any curling movie at all, for that matter). To that end, I'm going to write one, inspired by the '70's classic
Slap Shot.
Burt Reynolds will be perfect in the
Paul Newman role as player/coach
Reggie Dunlop (the "skip" in curling parlance). Of course, we'll need to have the
Hanson Brothers. This time the boys will forever be getting in trouble for "high broom sticking" and "rock greasing."
Finally, let's not forget
Ogie Ogilthorpe, the notorious Federal League goon. In my curling-infused re-telling, he'll be infamous for his "prison shower" shenanigans (suffice to say it involves a sharpened curling broom handle levied in the vicinity of the opponent's thrower, just as he's bent over about to deliver the rock). You'll laugh, you'll cry - it'll be
better than Cats. Of course, we'll need a new title. I like
Stacking The Brooms.
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